Life Outside PLT1

im shutting down my accounts with dating sites: signal to noise is so high i dont get a good laugh anymore.

April 10, 2008 on 12:40 pm | In Uncategorized | | Jonny Chaos

Fucking freaks, I swear.

These people are weird, insecure and 13 short of a dozen. my best so far is this girl in LA who starts an account, browses my profile then kills it off. 6 times. 6 FUCKING TIMES! twit. She has done it under the following aliases:

• alonelygirl269
• Nygrl420f
• Lababee
• lagrl269
• lonelygrl269la
• alonelygirl269

theres also a bunch of random sluts, so i started my own fake account and sent a couple of messages:

To: sluttymistress
Subject: you stupid bitch
if you’re going to troll a dating site for something to fuck, at least show a real photo, or, heaven forbid, cut the name of the bikini company’s site you nicked the images off. and you could have picked a model without thighs that could crush suns.

I’d offer to fuck you, but I’m afraid that I could catch being a fucking retard through a condom.

hope you die swiftly,

Love, the Scarlet Bastard

To: sun_moon_earth
Subject: another online slut.
clearly you have the face of a dog. if you had an attractive face, you would advertise the goods. and moreso: if you are so good at scoring, why are you trolling dating sites? too ugly to score at a bar? nice tits though.

Love, the Scarlet Bastard

seriously, WTF?

a nicer note though, I added a kiwi band working it over the ditch to my myspace friends, and they were nice enough to send back a message.

Hey bro,

Thanks for flickin us a friends request. We see you have some mighty Dunedin bands in ya friends section! The bombers fuckin rock as well - easilly one of the fav Auck bands along with 5th Threat. We’re battling away over here - played 3 shows in 8 months and fuck me… i can’t tell you how much we’re not into practicing anymore! Our last recording didnt come off the way we wanted it to…hence all the practcing on new songs and getting something together for the end of the year. I assume you might know some of the same people we know back home so pass on our hellos! Thanks for givin a shit bro,

Not Ok

so i sent a message back:

Cheers for the message. It’s fucking great to see good bands give a shit back. And cheers for putting in the work, maybe you’ll bump some of the shit off the charts, I’d much rather see good acts make it than marketing efforts disguised as music.

If i bump into anyone that knows/knows of you ill give them the hellos.

-Jonny

am I in the “scene” yet? yays.